PLEASE (DON'T) WANT ME: THE THERAPEUTIC ACTION OF MALE SEXUAL DESIRE IN THE TREATMENT OF HETEROSEXUAL MEN

In certain clinical situations, desire and arousal are significant components of the intersubjective field. In these cases, the analyst's wish to bear witness extends to both mind and body. This article will explore the impact of absent, violent, or otherwise unavailable fathers on their heterosexual sons and the resulting longing for male attention, admiration, and love, which often includes a need to be admired physically and romantically in ways their fathers could not provide. When this desire emerges in the treatment, the male analyst who experiences an erotic countertransference response and can manage potential anxiety and shame is in a unique position to provide the patient with these necessary supplies. Two case examples will be considered.